FROM THE SUBLIME TO THE RIDICULOUS, PART ZWEIUNDZWANZIG

(German because our soon to be ex-president was in Germany this past week)

 

SUBLIME

 

There is nothing sublime in Packerville these days. Actually I am wrong come to think about it. I made Frozen Tundra Chili last week and it was delicious. Here's the recipe:

Not So Frozen Tundra

 

Ingredients

- 2 pounds ground beef chuck
- 1 pound bulk Italian sausage
- 1 (15 oz) can black beans, drained
- 1 (15 oz) can kidney beans, in sauce
- 1 (15 oz) can pinto beans, drained
- 1 (15 oz) can navy beans, drained
- 2 (28 oz) cans diced tomatoes with juice (in jalapeños if you like) 
- 2 (6 oz) cans tomato paste
- 1 large yellow onion, chopped
- 3 stalks celery, chopped
- 1 green bell pepper, seeded and chopped
- 1 red bell pepper, seeded and chopped
- 2 green chile peppers, seeded and chopped
- 1/2 lb bacon, chopped
- 4 cubes beef bouillon
- 1 bottle beer (preferably Guinness)
- 1/4 cup chili powder
- 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
- 4 tablespoon minced garlic
- 1 tablespoon dried oregano
- 4 teaspoons ground cumin
- 1/4 cup hot sauce
- 1 tablespoon dried basil
- 1 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 2 teaspoon ground black pepper
- 4 tablespoon cayenne pepper
- 1 tablespoon white sugar
- 1 (10.5 oz) bag corn chips
- 1 (16 oz) package shredded Wisconsin Cheddar cheese (Yellow)
- 1 cup Fresh, Chopped, Green Onions
- 2 cups Sour Cream

 

Preparation

- Heat a large stock pot over medium-high heat. Crumble the ground chuck, and cook until evenly browned. Drain off excess grease. In a medium frying pan, crumble the sausage, and cook until evenly browned. Drain off excess grease.
- Pour in all the cans of beans, diced tomatoes and tomato paste. Add the onion, celery, green and red bell peppers, chile peppers, bacon, bouillon, and beer. Season with chili powder, Worcestershire sauce, garlic, oregano, cumin, hot pepper sauce, basil, salt, pepper, cayenne, paprika, and sugar. Stir to blend, then cover and simmer over low heat for at least 3 1/2 hours, stirring occasionally.
- After 2 hours, taste, and adjust salt, pepper, and chili powder if necessary. The longer the chili simmers, the better it will taste. Remove from heat and serve, or refrigerate, and serve the next day. 

RIDICULOUS

 

The Packers are not only mediocre, but also irrelevant it seems. On the day of the NFL trading deadline the Packers were not even mentioned although they need help. However, being ignored wasn't the worse insult of the day.

 

On the same day FOX Sports put out a list of the 13 scariest football players of all time and not a single Packer made the list and at least two should have.

 

Side note: When I first saw the title I thought he was talking appearance and when I think of scary I think of waking up at night to see a face that would give you a heart attack or a wet bed. But Brett Smiley's list was about playing ability. I like my idea better although a few on his list would also be on my version.

 

1. Lawrence Taylor (1981-93). I guess the prototype of today's hybrid linebackers was pretty violent on the field, but I bet teenage girls find him pretty scary now. In fact, his son has shown a predilection towards jailbait, too.

 

Hey, Little Girl

2. Deacon Jones (1961-74). He was scary both in person and on the field with his "head slap" to the head. He also invented the word "sack".

 

The Deacon About to "SACK" Bart Starr

3. Jack Lambert (1974-84). He like was a lot like Jones being scary on and off the field. TO: 3. Jack Lambert (1974-84). He was a lot like Jones scary on and off the field.

 



Jack Lambert Was Scary

4. Dick Butkus (1965-73). I find this selection insulting for many reasons concerning the Bears and Packers rivalry which I will illustrate a little farther down. Also besides his name (the human example of Uranus) Butt Kiss looked like a big teddy bear.

 

5. Steve Atwater (1989-99). I would say Jack "The Assassin" Tatum and ex-Packer Chuck "Scud" Cecil were more scary than "The Smiling Assassin".

 



The 2nd 'The Hit' - Tatum Paralyzing Darryl Stingley

6. Ray Lewis (1996-2012). Another man who didn't look that scary, but in real life was a murderer. I guess that qualifies as scary. I guess Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez should be honorable mention at this spot.

 

Not The Only NFL Player That Got Away With Murder

7. Dick "Night Train" Lane (1952-65). He had a habit of clothesline tackles or "Night Train Neckties" as his tackles were called once said, "There’s nothing I hate worse than a first down. It means I have to stay out there for three more plays. I grab them around neck so I can get back to the bench and sit me down.”

 

8. Chuck Bednarik (1949-62). He was a tough guy, but the scary part to me was he was a member of the only team to have beaten Vince Lombardi's Packers in the playoffs. However, he is more known as the guy who almost killed Frank Gifford.

 

The 1st 'The Hit' - Bednarik Laying Out Gifford

9. Jim Brown (1957-65). Brown is more scary now that he was when he was playing, especially as an advisor to the current Browns. Contrary to popular belief the Browns weren't named after him.

 

10. Conrad Dobler (1972-81). He was a biter and that is scary when you are sitting at the bottom of the pile and Dobler was lifting his helmet. He once said, "Some men get vasectomies; I used to give them.”

 

Dobler Was Just Plain Mean

11. James Harrison (2002-present). I wouldn't want to meet him in an ally or a bowling ally for that matter. He seems crazy, too.

 

Harrsion Looks Good In Stripes, Just sayin'

12. Randy Moss (1998-2012). I think Moss is more ugly than scary. I'm glad his famous "Moon Over Green Bay" antic wasn't worse and he actually pulled his pants down. As ugly as he is in the face his "moon" would have been worse.

 

'Moon Over Green Bay'

13. "Mean Joe" Green (1969-81). The only thing scary about him was his name.

 

Now for the ridiculous part. Ray Nitschke should have been on this list instead of the bane of his existence, besides Jim Carter (look it up), Dick ButtKiss. Doesn't this picture say it all.

 

Now That's The Face Of A Middle Linebacker

Also Willie Wood should have been on Smiley's list because "Next to Lombardi, Wood scares his own teammates more than anybody else does. Wood even scares Ray Nitschke. 'I hate to miss a tackle,' Ray says, ' 'cause if I do, I know I'm gonna get a dirty look from Willie. He'll kill you with that look.' " as told by Jerry Kramer in the excellent and must read for all Packer Backers in Instant Replay.

 

'The Stare' That Scared Ray Nitschke